He’s the outgoing, overly friendly plant dad who chats with strangers at the nursery. I’m the passive-aggressive introvert who plants out of spite and labels weeds “ground cover.” (But don't f*ck with my roses!)

We post a mix of mildly educational content and unhinged garden updates, because honestly—we have no idea what we’re doing. We just dig holes, plant stuff, and hope for the best.

If you're here for laughs, learning (maybe), or just want to feel better about your own yard... welcome to f_ckgardening. 🌱💀🌼